Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Hazy Shade Of Winter

The new year has emerged through a canopy of dark clouds and a screen of winter rain. Some may call this a bad omen, starting the year off with such harsh weather, but I can only think of everything that’s going to come after the shadows have subsided and a shade of sunshine replaces the liquid sheets of storm.

The Bangles (remember them?) performed on one of the many New Year’s Eve specials and I heard (or LISTENED to) an old song for the first time – Hazy Shade of Winter (originally by Simon & Garfunkel). It was a song on the Less Than Zero soundtrack; that movie from 1987 where Andrew McCarthy, Robert Downey, Jr. and Jamie Gertz deal with the pressures of a wealthy upbringing, especially issues with drugs. Anyhow, when I used to watch this music video, with clips of the movie playing between verses and refrains, I remember thinking how the rhythm of the song played in perfect correlation to the pace of the movie: slow, then fast, a little chaotic, dizzying…and then this sudden ending.

It’s funny how last year, I feel like I was always trying to do more than one thing at a time. I caught myself a few times and attempted to calm down, get things straight and then proceed to complete whatever it was I set out to do. But I could never just stop, out of my own free will. Something or someone had to say, “Anna, it’s okay, you’re okay.” Then and only then was I able to stop, be aware and then think about what the hell I was doing. Each time I sat to think about it all, I knew I was another day older, and everything and everyone around me was changing. I was reminded that time has no master but itself and I couldn’t do anything about it.

Such a haze of fear can easily take over. There are days when I feel like it’ll be winter all year long; like when relationships feel ice cold, self-confidence is reduced to a barren wasteland of mere potential and inspiration’s foliage has fallen from their trees. But then springtime always comes quickly behind the dawn of a new year, leaving only puddles of rain and patches of snow – remnants of what the winter brought, signs of what the spring will bring...

Hazy Shade Of Winter

Time, time, time
See what's become of me
While I looked around
For my possibilities
I was so hard to please

Look aroundLeaves are brown
And the sky
Is a hazy shade of winter
Hear the salvation army band
Down by the riverside
It's bound to be a better ride
Than what you've got planned
Carry a cup in your hand

Hang on to your hopes my friend
That's an easy thing to say
But if your hopes should pass away
Simply pretend
That you can build them again

Look around
Grass is high
Fields are ripe
It's the springtime of my life

Seasons change with the scenery
Weaving time in a tapestry
Won't you stop and remember me

Look around
Leaves are brown
And the sky
It's a hazy shade of winter

Look around
Leaves are brown
There's a patch of snow on the ground

No comments: