LIVE AND LEARN

I grew up thinking that making mistakes, of any kind, was unacceptable in life. Academically, I found it hard to strive for less than perfection. Socially, when it came to family and friends, I was very careful to be as compromising and likeable as I could. The problem with this illusory way of life is that when things became less than ideal, I scrambled for the next best thing to get me back on track: covering up what was really going on. I just couldn’t bear to think of something not working out the way I thought they should.

Slowly came adolescence, the mecca of mistake-making! From schoolwork that more often than before came back to me with less than perfect scores, to friends whose trust and loyalty were really masks for manipulation and betrayal, I began to truly see the imperfect world before me when I got to high school…and I freakin’ hated it!

There are a lot of experiences I wish I could have prevented; a lot of hastily-made decisions I wish I could take back. There are so many moments in my life that I wish didn’t affect me the way they did. Only lately (literally) have I been paying much attention to all the lessons I missed out on seeing before; living proverbs that, if I had been more observant, could have saved me a lot of grief thereafter. But embarrassment and hurt can sure dent a person’s pride, can’t they? I swear I’ve acted like life, for me, has been pre-destined for doom after a short series of unfortunate events left me on the erroneous side. "OH WOH IS ME!" I cried, "POOR ME!" Dumb! GET OVER YOURSELF WOMAN! Everything happens for a reason. I've acertained my conviction in this now more than ever. Even if the reason doesn't apparate as quickly as we expect it to, we have to believe that it will eventually...even if it takes years!

So what if it’s taken me 8 years to learn from ONE of my mistakes? At least I realize it now and have actually made a point to put the “fixing” into practice. Geez, Anna…so damn slow. It’s okay though, because, as the age-old saying goes, “Better late than never.”

"To maintain the ability to admit and grow from our mistakes rather than let them defeat us represents best the inner strength of a people."
Haki Madhubuti

"An error doesn't become a mistake until you refuse to correct it."
O. A. Battista

"Trying to grow up is hurting, you know. You make mistakes. You try to learn from them, and when you don't, it hurts even more."
Aretha Franklin