FISHTAILING

So after a tiring, but fun-filled weekend in Vegas, we headed towards home. I had Ate Tin-Tin, Stacy, Cile & Rochelle keeping me company on the ride back. Traffic was sporadic. Conversational topics ranged from favorite fetishes to Rochelle thanking God that her niece's neck still works (backstory to be provided by the storyteller herself). We were almost home when the scariest thing I've yet experienced occurred.

We were driving down the 10 freeway, settled on the 2nd to fastest lane when this big black truck tried to switch to my lane. Either this sorry excuse for a driver jackass didn't look over his shoulder and see me there, or he seriously thought he could cut me off. Before he could smack onto my left side, I swerved to the right, which, at 70 mph, can, and did, produce the longest 20-30 seconds of my life. I lost control of the steering wheel and fishtailed back and forth for what felt like an eternity. Thank goodness there were no cars around me because I thought we were done for. I resisted the urge to slam on the brakes because I KNEW the car would flip over if I did. So, with everyone in the car yelling, “Anna! Anna!” I managed to decelerate and get the car back under my quivering hands, which had never gripped the steering wheel so tightly before.

Our hearts still pounding, we all managed to calm down. Well, THEY all managed to calm ME down. I cursed for a few minutes, drank some water, hoping that the truck who sped off gets exactly what it deserves for causing such a scare. I hope his shiny truck gets keyed, or better yet, gets attacked by a long row of runaway carts at a Target. KARMA WILL GET YOU, A**HOLE!

By the way, much props to my guardian angel, Gordon aka Gordy. You were clutch last night man! Thanks for being so alert all the time!

Ok, I better get to bed. But first I think I’ll say an hour-long prayer of relief and thanksgiving. I get it, Lord – “Don’t change the cd, grab for your wallet or stare at a cute guy walking on the sidewalk…JUST DRIVE!”