SOMETHING BRIGHTER

They say when you've reached your lowest point in life (or feel that you have), the only way to go is UP. What and where is "up," really? A metaphor for optimism I suppose; perhaps a hint of greater things to come after dreams are crushed and hopes are lost along this confusion we call our 20's? (Cue violin music please)

Yes, I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle sometimes...or most of the time. And it'd be so easy to blame the death toll of available credit and cash in-flows on naivete and ignorance. But I'm angry because I know that I put myself in this seemingly bottomless pit of debt and deficit. Apparently I'm a great a contender when it comes to a quick hand at flashing a credit card and saving face, than I am a well-trained economist who knows when enough is enough.

I balanced my checkbook last night, seeking to find an error in my calculations so that maybe I'd actually have more than I fear I truly do; hoping that "hand to mouth" would never ever apply to me (and our 60-day Microsoft Office trial is done and I can't get into any of my files and it costs $149.00 to get it GEEEEEEEEEEZ!). I'm aware of my situation, and, though I know coins and bills may never rain down from the heavens, I believe there's a reason - as I always do. And I always remind myself of how fortunate I am compared to so many in this world who are worse off. I wanna kick myself in rear every time I catch my pity parade rolling in. Cry me a river, Anna...

Anyhow, there's a song by Aqualung that I can't seem to stop listening to. Though the context seems to speak of falling in love, there's a general optimism that screams from beneath the notes that I hope I can talk about someday, perhaps after the dark clouds disappear. Can you imagine experiencing something "BRIGHTER THAN SUNSHINE?" What a wonderful image to aspire to!

I never understood before
I never knew what love was for
My heart was broke, my head was sore
What a feeling

Tied up in ancient history
I didnt believe in destiny
I look up you're standing next to me
What a feeling

What a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
Brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, I don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine
And it's brighter than sunshine

I never saw it happening
I'd given up and given in
I just couldn't take the hurt again
What a feeling

I didn't have the strength to fight
Suddenly you seemed so right
Me and you
What a feeling

It's brighter than the sun
It's brighter than the sun
It's brighter than the sun, sun, shine.

Love will remain a mystery
But give me your hand and you will see
Your heart is keeping time with me

I got a feeling in my soul ...