defer [di-fur]
to put off (action, consideration, etc.) to a future time; to put off action; delay
Synonyms include: hold up, postpone, suspend

A Dream Deferred
By: Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?

It's funny to think that I was so unhappy at my previous job, I was seriously thinking about applying to grad school ASAP and then quitting if I got accepted into a program. 2 years ago I was ready to be a full-time student again - a grad student reading and writing for my very life, the M.A. waiting to be added to my name. Then the job 40 miles away came along and I found something new that made me happy. New things always provide such brilliant sparks in life, don't they?

It's weird what 1 year can do to your perspective. Now, no matter how much I enjoy it still, the new job is just a job that has me spent at the end of every day and I find myself asking how much longer I want to keep grad school waiting; (not long because my GRE scores are only good until 2010 and I refuse to take it again...dammit, I just jinxed myself didn't I?). I just got comfortable, that's all.

Tin's been looking at colleges lately (I know, don't even get me started) and I'm so excited to see where she ends up. She has so much to look forward to!! (Oh geez, she's strumming the rubberbands in her mouth and she's complaining that she can't yawn. HAHAHA! LOSER!) It's got me thinking a lot, and how sometimes I forget that at 29, I still have a lot to look forward to too! I just have to get off my ass and expend some energy doing things that will enrich my life, with people who will do the same. Yay, can't wait to stop deferring!