penitent [pen-i-tuhnt]

feeling or expressing sorrow for sin or wrongdoing and disposed to atonement and amendment; repentant; contrite

Synonyms include: apologetic, regretful, remorseful

In elementary school, we went to confession every month (if not every other week) like clockwork. When I got to high school, a priest came to visit and hear confession every Ash Wednesday. When I got to college, confession turned into something that I only did if I missed Sunday mass. For me, reconciliation has become the neglected sacrament. Next to holy communion, it's the sacrament we can receive as often as we want to...so what's with the oversight? How about self-righteousness, ironically mixed in with a little guilt and shame? Talk about the perfect recipe for confession.

On Wednesday night, my family and I attended a penance service at church. Hundreds of people attended this last chance to clean out our hearts and souls before Easter Sunday. Not having gone in a year, it was difficult to sit in that box, think of the year's worth of sins, and then unload to Fr. Joe. Who likes admitting to and then apologizing to God (Who already knows we did it) for everything they've done wrong? But there lies the silver lining after: forgiveness.

When debris left from wrongdoing have collected to create a pile of revenge and hatred, our first instinct is to leave it there because we think it'll protect us; but what it really does is keep us from realizing that we were hurt or that we hurt someone else. I've learned a lot about forgiveness in the last year, through situations excluding even my own, and I found that whether you're asking for it or offering it, it will always provide way more protection for our hearts and souls than the alternative ever will. Forgiveness uses love to defeat hatred and turns foes into allies.

"The weak can never forgive.

Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."

~ Mahatma Gandhi