quietude [kwahy-i-tood]
the state of being quiet; tranquillity; calmness; stillness; a state of peace and quiet
Synonyms include: calmness, tranquility, peace

Last weekend we threw my grandmother a surprise 80th birthday party with a barrio fiesta theme complete with banderitas hanging around the perimeter of the dancefloor, folk dances, music sung in tagalog and the laughter of family and friends everywhere. All this for my sweet Nanay.

Finally we can stop sneaking around, speaking in whispers and making up stories. It was a truly great day to celebrate the milestone birthday of the most kindhearted lady I know. Everyone present was there probably because she had somehow touched a part of their lives. Speaking as someone who has been partly raised by her, it has made all the difference to have someone like Nanay so nearby all my life.

The minute that I arrived here from the Philippines at age 4, Nanay’s genuineness, her loving care, her innate ability to be the nicest, sweetest woman in the room was obvious to me. You will rarely, if ever at all, see her angry or feel unwelcome when you’re around her. She greets you with a laugh and smile that tells you how much you mean to her. She also probably babysat half of the guests there that day. Matt and I used to be her #1 customers when we were little.
After school time was filled with not just homework, but with a bowl of wonton soup or hot cocoa on a cold day, or fried egg and pan de sal for a snack. Whether it’s during a party or an unexpected visit to say hello, she is always armed with some kind of food to offer you – maybe she just cooked adobo, or maybe some Chinese food from lunch earlier, or donuts! Hahaha! Whether you’re one of her children, one of her grandchildren, isa sa mga pamangkin o pinsan niya, kaibigan o kapitbahay, nothing gives her greater joy than making you feel special, no matter where you are or what time of the day it is.

In my 29 years of life, one memory of Nanay sticks out to me. She used to ring the doorbell or call my sister and me on the phone at 7 am during school breaks when we cherish sleeping in late, inviting (quite persistently!) us to come over and eat breakfast. But in most cases, she’ll just leave a plate of spam and a big bowl of fried rice on our kitchen counter, ready for us when we finally woke up. Actually, now that I think about it, things like this didn't just happen for breakfast. They occured for lunch, merienda and dinner too! haha!

So aside from knowing that I WILL NEVER GO HUNGRY as long as she is here, it’s this simple gesture that reminds me constantly of Nanay’s kind heart and her example of generosity and obvious love for God and everything and everyone that she has been blessed with. This is what makes everyone want to celebrate her life.

This celebration was long overdue, for this lady who gives so much more than she receives. Often found sitting contently in the kitchen, or watching TFC in her room, or hanging laundry on the clothesline in the patio, Nanay speaks so little (unless she's insisting that you eat), yet you can always tell how she's feeling just by looking at her. She's not outspoken at all, but everything she says either makes us laugh or makes us just want to give her a hug. How lucky are we? Probably luckier than we will ever realize.