GONE IS THE WISDOM

I had 3 wisdom teeth extracted yesterday. After my consultation last week, the dental assistant handed me a tiny envelope. “That’s valium, “she advised. “Take it one hour before your surgery. It’s just a sedative, just to kinda calm you down.” Hmmm, it’s just my wisdom teeth. I need to be calmed down? The only thing I’d known of valium is that River Phoenix, rest his soul, overdosed which resulted in his death. So I called Bobbers, my favorite pharmacist, for more info. “Bobbers, what’s valium?” And she answered, “Banana, that’s a narcotic!” COOL! DRUGS! He he…

So I took my valium yesterday morning at 9:50 am, got to my dentist’s office at 10:45 am, took 4 amoxicillin capsules and then got underway. All the dental assistants were really nice, very smart gals who assisted Dr. Stamper. They rolled the blood pressure thingy on my arm, placed suction cups on various parts of my chest and tummy, and after a mask was placed over my nose and mouth, the last words I heard were, “Ok Anna, you’re gonna get kinda sleepy now.”

Maybe half an hour later or so, I heard Dr. Stamper’s voice, “Okee dokee, that’s it!” One of the dental techs helped me up and lay me in the recovery room. I swear, I never knew dental offices had recovery rooms. That’s so funny to me. Anyhow, Ate Tin-Tin came in, and she was talking to me but next thing I know, I’m waking up. She’s all, “Dude, I was talking to you about Harry Potter and next thing I know you’re snoring!”

Ate was literally a 24-hour nurse to me. She took me to Islands on Thursday night for a "last dinner", then after taking me home after my surgery, she went to the pharmacy to get my Vicodin, Zithromax and this medicated mouthwash that I apparently need to kill bacteria. And then she stayed with me all day, as I changed the bloody gauze from my mouth every half hour, spitting constantly, downing a painkiller which knocked me our for a few hours and then when my parents got home, she hung out with me for a while longer before she went on her way. THANKS SO MUCH ATE! Happy hour at ISLANDS is on me the next few times. LOVE YOU BIG SISTER!

So now I’m trapped here at home, on a liquid/soft food diet which, in the last 12 hours, has consisted of mango or chocolate sorbet, soup (which I have to wait to get lukewarm or cold because I can’t drink or eat anything hot until probably Monday) and mashed potatoes that I take forever to eat because I can’t open my mouth very wide. I’ve got an icepack attached to my left cheek 24/7 because, as the doctor warned, the bottom left tooth would be most “tender” (that’s SO another word of painful) because it sits right above a nerve. I’m missing more partying this weekend and I’m so bummed! Dumb wisdom teeth!

Ok, I better get going. "May cause drowsiness" says the label on the Vicodin bottle. No kidding...